Vision Statement
Ben Speaks . . . creating a culture where all people are valued and supported to be their best selves.
​
​Our Mission
Ben Speaks provides positive channels of expression for youth, families and communities through events, education and resources.
​
Who is a BEN?
Are you a Ben?
Are you raising a Ben?
Are you teaching a Ben?
Do you know a Ben . . . an at-risk youth in your community
​
What is a BEN?
-
A Ben is unique and beats to his or her own drum
-
A Ben is artistic, creative, intuitive, sensitive and empathetic
-
A Ben is labelled with a mental illness or learning disability at an early age
-
A Ben is often medicated
-
A Ben feels like a misfit and is an easy mark for the bully or becomes one himself
-
A Ben tends to self-harm in some way as a teenager
-
A Ben becomes isolated and left out
-
A Ben is not broken
-
A Ben has one or many gifts to bring to the world
-
There is a little bit of Ben in all of us
​
Ben's Story
In a fleeting moment of despair, Benjamin Giovangelo, our beautiful, intuitive, creative, sensitive and loving son, chose to end his life on April 16, 2009, just six days after his 18th birthday. Benjamin struggled with Bipolar Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) beginning early on in his life, and so did his family, both with him and the stigma of mental illness.
Ben Speaks Louder Than Words was born through his loss and today is a powerful voice in the world for change through the team at Ben Speaks Louder Than Words.
Everyone knows a Ben . . . an at-risk youth in your community.
Together we can support all Ben’s to thrive.
A Ben is:
-
Labelled with a mental illness or learning disability at an early age.
-
Often medicated
-
Artistic, creative, intuitive, sensitive and empathetic.
-
Someone who feels like a misfit.
-
An easy mark for the bully or becomes one himself.
-
Someone who tends to self-harm in some way as a teenager.
-
Isolated and left out.
A Ben is NOT broken. A Ben has gifts to bring to the world. There is a little bit of Ben in all of us.
From the beginning, Ben was given medication to attempt to manage his behavior to fit him into our current education and social systems. He received the message early and often that there was something wrong with him. He experienced much ostracizing and bullying. As his parents, we did our best to find alternative ways to work with Ben and, over the years, we had learned many tools to deal with this bright, sensitive, intuitive, and energetic child.
Our family suffered greatly with little to no resources to support our son. Over the years of raising Ben, although his life ended tragically, he made great strides through a combination of supporting strategies. Through medicine, therapy, yoga, breathing techniques, the power of intention, positive channels for the emotions, monthly massage and more. We created a powerful toolbox for change for our mentally ill son, beginning with seeing and focusing on his gifts. With this combination of support and shift in consciousness, Ben, between the age of 12 and his last day of life made marked changes.
Those major shifts include going from…
-
Being a student behind in school with many learning challenges to catching up and passing his MCAS exam
-
80 mgs of Prozac to less than 10 mgs of Lorazapan for anxiety and 10 mgs of Ritalin for focus.
-
Being overweight and low energy to growing tall and gorgeous.
-
Being alone, friendless, unpopular and sitting alone for over a year at the lunch room table at his high school to growing more and more comfortable in his own skin and attracting girls like he had never known.
​
So what happened? Well, in addition to his other challenges, Ben was a child who “brain-locked”, a term used by Ross Greene, PhD, the author of “The Explosive Child.” Dr. Greene is the Director of Cognitive-Behavioral Psychology at the Clinical and Research Program in Pediatric Psychopharmacology at the Massachusetts General Hospital. This book describes “brain-lock” as the clinical and physical response to the ability of the OCD brain to process immense frustration. Brain-locking adequately describes the thousands of times when Ben would come up against situations where he couldn’t get what he wanted and acted extremely inappropriately. He would literally fight to his death in opposition to controlling forces. Those of us around him had to find creative, innovative approaches to move through whatever issues arose on a daily basis. He wanted things to be fair and just.
Whenever something came in the form of force or “power over,” he was a counter force to be reckoned with and would push back even harder. It was very difficult for Ben and us as his family unit, stress-filled and intense on a daily basis, but we had made great strides by the time his 18th birthday arrived, so much so that Ben was finally making and holding onto friendships, getting better grades, and holding a job. Socially, he succeeded in becoming a kid that was loved after many years of “not fitting in.” He was on top of the world.
An incident occurred on April 16, 2009 that resulted in Ben’s suspension from school and from attending his prom, which must have felt like having the rug pulled out from underneath this one major success in his short life - social acceptance by his peers. On the day he took his life, we believe the loss of his prom caused him to brain-lock. We wish that this decision had not been made so quickly and do not understand why, given Ben’s history, we did not have a chance to meet with his team collectively before his sentence was handed down. If we had, I believe that Ben would still be here with us now.
Ben went home and took his life that day. His last message to us included the line “I just don’t see the point.” Resignation at so young an age, after 18 years of pushing against an antiquated system… and currently we have an epidemic of suicide amongst our young people. Since his death, Ben has been speaking louder than words to me, his mother. I am taking a stand because we must find better ways to support these gifted, sensitive, and exceptional children.
There is a lot that I still do not know or understand. But what I do know is this: every day is a choice and each of us, no matter what life challenges we face, get to choose life or death in every moment and that we are powerful creators without measure.
Through Ben, I have become a role model for change and a teacher, mentor and voice for accountability and growing oneself strong from the inside out. I live my life in gratitude for this opportunity to serve through the countless lessons and blessings I have learned in the raising and loss of Ben Giovangelo, who continues to be my greatest teacher.
With All My Love,
Judy Giovangelo
​
​
​
​
Vision Statement
Ben Speaks . . . creating a culture where all people are valued and supported to be their best selves.
​
​Our Mission
Ben Speaks provides positive channels of expression for youth, families and communities through events, education and resources.
​
Who is a BEN?
Are you a Ben?
Are you raising a Ben?
Are you teaching a Ben?
Do you know a Ben . . . an at-risk youth in your community
​
What is a BEN?
-
A Ben is unique and beats to his or her own drum
-
A Ben is artistic, creative, intuitive, sensitive and empathetic
-
A Ben is labelled with a mental illness or learning disability at an early age
-
A Ben is often medicated
-
A Ben feels like a misfit and is an easy mark for the bully or becomes one himself
-
A Ben tends to self-harm in some way as a teenager
-
A Ben becomes isolated and left out
-
A Ben is not broken
-
A Ben has one or many gifts to bring to the world
-
There is a little bit of Ben in all of us
​
Ben's Story
In a fleeting moment of despair, Benjamin Giovangelo, our beautiful, intuitive, creative, sensitive and loving son, chose to end his life on April 16, 2009, just six days after his 18th birthday. Benjamin struggled with Bipolar Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) beginning early on in his life, and so did his family, both with him and the stigma of mental illness.
Ben Speaks Louder Than Words was born through his loss and today is a powerful voice in the world for change through the team at Ben Speaks Louder Than Words.
Everyone knows a Ben . . . an at-risk youth in your community.
Together we can support all Ben’s to thrive.
A Ben is:
-
Labelled with a mental illness or learning disability at an early age.
-
Often medicated
-
Artistic, creative, intuitive, sensitive and empathetic.
-
Someone who feels like a misfit.
-
An easy mark for the bully or becomes one himself.
-
Someone who tends to self-harm in some way as a teenager.
-
Isolated and left out.
A Ben is NOT broken. A Ben has gifts to bring to the world. There is a little bit of Ben in all of us.
From the beginning, Ben was given medication to attempt to manage his behavior to fit him into our current education and social systems. He received the message early and often that there was something wrong with him. He experienced much ostracizing and bullying. As his parents, we did our best to find alternative ways to work with Ben and, over the years, we had learned many tools to deal with this bright, sensitive, intuitive, and energetic child.
Our family suffered greatly with little to no resources to support our son. Over the years of raising Ben, although his life ended tragically, he made great strides through a combination of supporting strategies. Through medicine, therapy, yoga, breathing techniques, the power of intention, positive channels for the emotions, monthly massage and more. We created a powerful toolbox for change for our mentally ill son, beginning with seeing and focusing on his gifts. With this combination of support and shift in consciousness, Ben, between the age of 12 and his last day of life made marked changes.
Those major shifts include going from…
-
Being a student behind in school with many learning challenges to catching up and passing his MCAS exam
-
80 mgs of Prozac to less than 10 mgs of Lorazapan for anxiety and 10 mgs of Ritalin for focus.
-
Being overweight and low energy to growing tall and gorgeous.
-
Being alone, friendless, unpopular and sitting alone for over a year at the lunch room table at his high school to growing more and more comfortable in his own skin and attracting girls like he had never known.
​
So what happened? Well, in addition to his other challenges, Ben was a child who “brain-locked”, a term used by Ross Greene, PhD, the author of “The Explosive Child.” Dr. Greene is the Director of Cognitive-Behavioral Psychology at the Clinical and Research Program in Pediatric Psychopharmacology at the Massachusetts General Hospital. This book describes “brain-lock” as the clinical and physical response to the ability of the OCD brain to process immense frustration. Brain-locking adequately describes the thousands of times when Ben would come up against situations where he couldn’t get what he wanted and acted extremely inappropriately. He would literally fight to his death in opposition to controlling forces. Those of us around him had to find creative, innovative approaches to move through whatever issues arose on a daily basis. He wanted things to be fair and just.
Whenever something came in the form of force or “power over,” he was a counter force to be reckoned with and would push back even harder. It was very difficult for Ben and us as his family unit, stress-filled and intense on a daily basis, but we had made great strides by the time his 18th birthday arrived, so much so that Ben was finally making and holding onto friendships, getting better grades, and holding a job. Socially, he succeeded in becoming a kid that was loved after many years of “not fitting in.” He was on top of the world.
An incident occurred on April 16, 2009 that resulted in Ben’s suspension from school and from attending his prom, which must have felt like having the rug pulled out from underneath this one major success in his short life - social acceptance by his peers. On the day he took his life, we believe the loss of his prom caused him to brain-lock. We wish that this decision had not been made so quickly and do not understand why, given Ben’s history, we did not have a chance to meet with his team collectively before his sentence was handed down. If we had, I believe that Ben would still be here with us now.
Ben went home and took his life that day. His last message to us included the line “I just don’t see the point.” Resignation at so young an age, after 18 years of pushing against an antiquated system… and currently we have an epidemic of suicide amongst our young people. Since his death, Ben has been speaking louder than words to me, his mother. I am taking a stand because we must find better ways to support these gifted, sensitive, and exceptional children.
There is a lot that I still do not know or understand. But what I do know is this: every day is a choice and each of us, no matter what life challenges we face, get to choose life or death in every moment and that we are powerful creators without measure.
Through Ben, I have become a role model for change and a teacher, mentor and voice for accountability and growing oneself strong from the inside out. I live my life in gratitude for this opportunity to serve through the countless lessons and blessings I have learned in the raising and loss of Ben Giovangelo, who continues to be my greatest teacher.
With All My Love,
Judy Giovangelo
​
​
​
​
TESTIMONIALS
"I just want to thank you again for visiting and sharing with our kids. I wanted to let you know the feedback I got from the counselors after camp today was very positive. They thought it was a very appropriate presentation for Prana, and greatly appreciated you sharing your personal story. We all felt it was a good starting point for conversation with the campers."
​- Roberta Weiner, director of the Prana Center
“Watching Judy give these presentations was an incredibly impressive and deeply moving experience. In each of the presentations, the children were engaged, had their hearts and minds open, were compassionate, attentive, honest, present and grateful. Judy was able to reach them in a way I have never seen an adult be able to do when talking to a group of teenagers. They had never met her before, yet they opened themselves up to her and trusted her. Judy has had many obstacles to overcome in her life. A year ago, Judy lost her 18 year old son to suicide. Judy shared just enough of her life story to the children to connect with and engage them, but not too much as to upset them. Judy talked with the students about gratitude, about the power of positive thinking, about how positive thoughts about themselves and others creates emotional and physical strength and how negative thoughts about themselves and others result in emotional and physical weakness and stress. She talked about not only having positive thoughts, but also about the importance of positive action. She led exercises with the children that showed them that they all shared the same feelings, fears and experiences and how their collective positive thoughts and actions could make a significant difference in the world.
Judy is a natural, humble, kind and compassionate leader. She never lost control of the audience. Nor were any of the children disruptive. The children respected her, trusted her and felt compassion for her. Judy was successful in reaching the true selves of the students. The teachers who observed the presentation were also deeply moved and impressed. Many teachers and students came up to Judy afterwards to thank her and told her how helpful the experience was. After the presentation, one student approached a school administrator and said, "You brought her here for me, didn’t you?
I truly believe if every school invited Judy to present her workshops/presentations to the students, there would be less bullying, teen suicide, depression and drug use and more powerful, confident, happy, healthy, compassionate and loving children.”
- Sandra Pugh, owner of Plugged In Teen Bands, A non-profit organization in Needham, Ma., Presentation at St. Joe’s Middle School - Needham
​
"Dear Ms. Judy, I just wanted to tell you how amazing your presentation at my school was. It really changed everyone’s point of view on the subject – even the tough and popular kids were changed, I could tell. We never got to complete the hands and feet portion but we were all still talking about it long after you were there! You really made a difference at our school and I hope you will continue telling other kids and schools this message."
​
- Vincent Roberts – Six Grader – St. Joseph’s Middle School, Needham MA
​
"This morning on the "Today Show" there was a segment entitled Stressed-out Kids. It dealt with the benefits of Yoga to reduce stress in our children so they may learn and retain what they learn in school. The segment also expressed the huge health benefits of yoga for children and adults. With proper instruction our children would thrive with yoga as a means of coping with stress. Judy has been running successful yoga and "Stress-less Workshops" for Adults, children, scouts, and teachers long before it became fashionable. It has been her passion to heal, help and teach young minds to deal with the challenges we all face in our modern society. I have personally experienced Judy's yoga classes. I have been her student and friend for more than 3 years. My wife Linda who is a 2nd grade teacher at Jefferson Elementary School in Franklin Massachusetts and many of her friends have also been taking yoga instructions with Judy for over 3 years. We all highly recommend her as a loving, competent, experienced yoga and Stress-less Workshop Instructor for both children and adults.
- Paul A. Chelman Owner/Operator Enchanted Fox, Inc. www.enchantedfox.net
​
​“Judy is truly an artist and visionary in many fields. She has a natural ability to lead that has allowed her to continue to grow in her community as a yoga/healing facilitator. I worked as Judy's assistant for over a year. She respected me as an equal and allowed me to develop my own leadership skills and design skills under her guidance. Not only did I work with Judy, but I was also a client and shared Yoga and healing with her first hand. She opened me up to a regular Yoga practice, spirit singing and Reiki which allowed me to grow physically, emotionally and spiritually. Without her mentorship I truly don't believe I would have the confidence I now posses to pursue my own creative and professional endeavors. She inspired me to work in the creative arts when I lacked support from others and she was a model of success in this field. Judy takes on challenges with grace and ease and is a gifted public speaker. I recommend her work without reservation!”
- KT O'Donnell , Friend/Former Colleague
TESTIMONIALS
from Westfield & Bridgewater State Colleges
“Excellent – over the top – This all makes a lot of sense. My eyes have definitely been opened.”
- Tiffany, Westfield State College
“Mama Gio is an amazing person and her word needs to be heard by all – Extremely helpful.”
- Matt Lapan, Westfield State College
“Very relaxing and calming” - Gina Simonetti, Westfield
“Made me feel so good after. I felt so relaxed and everything I was stressed about did not matter anymore.” - Elizabeth Sistrand
“This was my first yoga experience and it was fun and stress relieving.”
- Shawn Bailey, Westfield
“Amazing job! Such a great program. It’s amazing how much what you teach helps us. Thank you so much.” - Jenn Fitzgerald, Westfield
“Very informative. A great resource for anyone. It was very helpful!”
- Lewie Cassidy, Westfield
“I feel amazing. Not only my body, but my mind. I really feel like a new person and I am definitely looking at life differently. You are amazing! – I feel so relaxed and like a whole new person.”
- Mary Saghbini, Bridgewater State
“I really enjoyed the conversations we did as a group. It made me less stressed about dealing with my father in the future.”
- Brittany Smith, Bridgewater State College
“Enlightening!!!” - Dave, Bridgewater
“Some of the yoga moves were a little hard, but rewarding. Meditation was amazing!”
-Tia LeBlanc, Bridgewater
“It was a very invigorating experience.” - Jack Dunphy, Bridgewater
“Definitely de-stressed me and brought me back to a calm state.”
- R. Gallagher, Bridgewater State
“Positive, Peaceful, Honest. This workshop centers the soul and mind and brings forth our potential in an effective way.”
- Ian Mick, Bridgewater State College
LEAVE US A TESTIMONIAL